family

art, childhood, children, education, family, life, lifepurpose, love

How to Love

Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

Love covers all.

At some point in time, we were all children. Having and or teaching children reminds you of that fact. Sark wrote and tapped into how to really love a child and in turn teaches us how to love ourselves. All of us are miracles. Keeping the gleam and joy and most of all: LOVE.

How to really love anyone including the self comes down to being present not only the presents. One of my favorite books entitled: The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman delves into how to love someone as it is so aptly titled the languages of love.

How do you show someone you love them? Find out their love language(s). Is it acts of service, quality time, physical touch, verbal affirmation and/or gift giving?

And, speak their love language with action and speak your own through action. Celebrate them. Celebrate you. Celebrate Earth. Walt Whitman: I celebrate myself, and sing myself, And what I assume you shall assume, For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you. https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45477/song-of-myself-1892-version

education, earlyed, behavior, development, children, family, help, family, lifepurpose, love, moments, neuroscience, parenting, play, relationships, self-help

Spark Joy

Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

Have you ever noticed how a child’s face will come alive when they are doing something they love and enjoy? Even grown ups will light up when they are doing something they love.

People who love what they do and love who they are don’t take vacations from it or from themselves. It lights a fire within sparking up a joy that cannot ever be contained. In life, humans light each other up along the way like lining up dominoes and with one gentle nudge, each domino knocks into the other crashing and cascading down. Or like Pringos, “Once you pop, you can’t stop!” LOL

No one can ever take that purpose away once ignited. It cannot be faked, copied, or even categoried <– made up word. Be you and pass on your light of being. The greatest gift is the gift of oneself. One’s own transformation and change.

Who are you? Who are you becoming?

What are you?

When were you? When are you?

Where were you and where are you?

Why are you?

How are you?

Be and become. The light. The love. The joy. The hiccups. haha

children, earlyed, education, family, life, love, moments, relationships, self-help, soul, therapy

The Gaslight is On

Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

While navigating life and growing: let’s be mindful and very cognizant of gaslighting phrases to recognize and heal from and through. Learn to recognize what and who is real. This is how we become. When you hear or have heard the following “gaslight” statements may it illuminate a “gaslight” and serve as a red flag to drive away, establish distance and fill your tank with what’s real. Here are those following “gaslights”.

That never happened. You remember that? I don’t remember that. That’s not how it happened. Then they spin it, flip it, manipulate it to fit themselves and it is truly incredulous. This makes you question your own very reality and memories. TRUST yourself. Your instincts and your memories. Denial and suppression could drive everyone mad. Don’t let it happen to you. Keep your voice even if it’s a whisper. For real! Truth always comes to light and when it does, trust the process and heal through the hurt.

You’re being too sensitive. Stop crying. Do you want me to give you something to cry for? When they dismiss your feelings or when you’re crying or even upset/mad, it’s a way to invalidate your emotions. Your feelings are are valid. Feel your feelings. Do not suppress. Remember that.

After all I’ve/we’ve done for you. This is such a classic and timeless guilt tripping tactic wrapped with a bow as gratitude and how you should feel so grateful. Remember this: You don’t owe anyone. Even further, you don’t owe them your life no matter what they’ve done. Keep your peace. Pay it forward.

No matter what, family comes first. **Only when family is healthy, responsible and mutually respectful. Otherwise, this is toxic and hard to swallow.

    Bonus: not a statement but noticing and learning the sound of silence and distinguish the sounds of footsteps and what they could mean for you, tone of voice / facial expressions and what may be in store for you.

    Lessons learned in the grand scheme of things that some people are broken and fragmented. But you don’t have to make excuses such as “that’s just the way they are”. And, look at you or who you are in a process of becoming, you learned (or are learning) not to make excuses for them or yourself.

    Resilient, thankful, nonetheless for the life lessons learned along the way. Like forgiveness and letting go. And, in distance well disguised as boundaries when noticing / recognizing when a “gaslight” comes on.

    All the lessons well learned. Heal. The only thing worth screaming is love, anyway. So love. Live. Peace. Light. Turn off the gas and turn the real light on. Light will always overpower darkness. Fill your bucket with truth and light, never emptying or giving away what’s real. What’s inside.

    books, childhood, children, culture, DAP, daycare, Ece, education, education, earlyed, behavior, development, children, family, help, family, life, love, moments, neuroscience, parenting, play, relationships, self-help, signs, soul, therapy, Uncategorized

    No Such thing as a Bad Kid…Remember that!

    Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

    Instead of asking: “What’s wrong with him or her?” Ask, “What happened to him or her?” This will help you guide and have a better relationship with the children and grown ups in your life.

    In a society that is in a rush to label, diagnose fix and break, be the exact opposite, be the one who slows down to notice, show compassion and listen. Just be there through the tears, through the ups and the downs. Notice and be present. Love.

    We are society and we can in fact, choose love, consistency and conversations where we listen more and talk less. Slow down, listen to what children are showing and sharing. You will find out exactly what they need, don’t need and in return what you need and what you don’t need.

    Slow down. Turtles have a lot to teach us in this way. Not the ninja turtles but the ones who hold up traffic as they cross the street. Taking their time. One turtle paw at a time. One paw in front of the other. There are times to be a cheetah and there are times to be a turtle. Choose wisely.

    art, children, culture, family, life, lifepurpose, love, parenting, relationships, self-help, soul, therapy

    Is my Jacket Expensive?

    Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

    Let’s talk. Wealth. Rich and Poor. While we teach our children to value what is inside of themselves: the who of what they are. Their being. Their essence. Others from outside will influence them or try to belittle them or what they care about at times, without even knowing it themselves. It tugs at their heart and their soul. Ours, too, just a little bit until we get the jolt back into what matters most. People. Relationships. Experiences. Memories. Time. Talent. Treasure.

    Our son asked, “Hey mom, is my jacket expensive?” Quite frankly, it doesn’t even matter. These things, no matter the cost won’t matter in the next five minutes or even in the next five years. If it won’t matter in the next minutes, months or even years: who cares. It’s not the jacket but the memories we make in it that truly matter. While most of society will try to convince you that your worth is determined by what you have on, in real real reality, it doesn’t. What your life depends on is who you are, who you surround yourself with and what you care about. So, take care of yourself, others and your surroundings/your space then it ripples outward and onward changing lives for the better.

    So, how much does your life cost? How much value and worth? Are you living poor in mindset? Have the courage to change it before it’s far too late. Don’t live for a too die for house. Don’t live for a too die for car.

    Live for a too die for life.

    Collect memories. Not things. Collect the times. Spend time well. Treasure it. We all have time, talent and treasure. It is how you define it. No one else. Love life. Live it well. Make it a life well spent. Spend life well. The currency is always strong when passionately and poetically lived.

    art, books, death, family, libraries, love, parenting, relationships, self-help, signs, soul, therapy

    The Power of Love and Healing (Deep Work=Deep Breaths)

    Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

    Photo by KawaiiArt1980 on Pexels.com

    “One can only travel the long way into the heart of another: the slow work of finding common ground, the careful discernment of grounds of admiration, the disciplines of kindness, encouragement, silence, and restraint. It takes a deliberate choice, renewed regularly, to love every human being one encounters.” (Zena Hitz)

    If it’s worth it, it will not be easy… something like that Bob Marley said. A monk was also quoted previously in response to this question:

    “What’s the hardest part about being a monk?” He said, “Other monks”.

    What’s the hardest part about life and love?

    Other people.

    Isn’t that funny? Other people. We do not have control. We have control only over oneself. Only of ourselves and how we respond or how we do not respond to others.

    They say the highest form of flattery is gossip. If you find yourself trembling off the lips of another it’s truly none of your business. Monks do not talk much as it’s well known. There is a reason for that. Self-discipline and restraint. Choose not to judge and just respect the journey we are all walking.

    Loving, guiding, whispering, petals of a flower as delicate as the work of our hands whether they are rough or smooth. Show your hands and it will show me your work.

    Follow the palmar flexion creases on your hands. Your hands are your life’s and love’s work.

    What you choose to do with your hands is your life’s work.

    If you wreak havoc and chaos. If you choose to hit and harm, it is never, ever forgotten and permanently stored somehow, someway into the deep recesses of one’s mind. Memories are stored deep and remembered. Never forgotten. We all are patients of our own memories. Choose to love and be gentle even if someone sees it as a weakness. Because, in fact, it is strength. Gentleness is strength. If someone hurt you, you forgive them but move on. You do not have to forget. Lessons are in it. You learn what not to accept. You learn what not to do. You learn the lessons life dishes out and deals. You remember, forgive and you move on. Let it move you to dance. To sing. To read. To draw. To write. To paint. To act. To create. Scream love.

    The [Heart, Mind, Brain and…] Body Keeps the Score always. A must read book is The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk M.D., found here: https://www.besselvanderkolk.com/resources/the-body-keeps-the-score

    …remember while it’s a long way into someone else heart, it’s also a long way into your own heart. It is a deliberate choice to love yourself just the way you are.

    art, artists, dreams, family, Holidays, Language, life, love, self-help

    Lean on Me…

    Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

    Photo by Tatiana Syrikova on Pexels.com

    Lean on me…

    When you’re not strong.

    There are so many songs that epitomize love, reliance and resilience. This one is one of my favorites.

    We fall. We get back up sometimes on our own or with someone else’s help.

    Then, the beautiful purpose of falling down is to help someone else up along the way.

    What did you do for the month of February? And, most importantly, the months prior and leading up to this month and after it, what are you planning?

    How do you show and share your love? How do you receive love?

    What are your love languages? Quality time? Gift giving? Service to others? Affirmations? Physical touch? A little bit of all of them?

    Love a little, a lot. Love a lot, a little.

    books, childhood, children, family, Language, life, love, parenting, parenting, play, relationships, self-help, therapy, Uncategorized

    26

    Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

    Photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels.com

    In the words of someone I love. ” Love you to the end of the alphabet... [and beyond it] “. Here are the abcs filled with love, light and affirmations. Cheers to speaking life and love over each other and our children.

    A for amazing and astounding.

    B for brave, bold and beautiful.

    C for courageous, considerate, compassionate and caring.

    D for determined and dedicated.

    E for evolving and energetic.

    F for fabulous and fun!

    G for giving and getting.

    H for healing and health.

    I for intelligent, inspiring and insightful.

    J for joyful and jazzy.

    K for knightly and kind.

    L for loving and learning.

    M for masterpiece and magnificent.

    N for neat, nice, natural and neverending!

    O for observant and ongoing.

    P for precious, persevering and playful.

    Q for quissential, quaint and quirky!

    R for resilient, respectful and ready for life!

    S for special and sweet.

    T for talented, timeless, thoughtful, tactful and tenacious.

    U for ubiquitous, unique, unconditional, unbeatable, ultimate and unabashed!

    V for valorous, valuable, venerable, vast, versatile and valiant.

    W for wise and wonderful.

    X for xenial and xylographic.

    Y for yogi, yielding, yaring and youthful.

    Z for zingy, zestful, zany and zen.

    Next time, sing with me!

    Ps. Love you, all 26 letters!

    childhood, children, earlyed, family, Holidays, love, moments, parenting, travel

    Deck the Halls with Lots of Love and Play

    Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

    Photo by Magda Ehlers on Pexels.com

    Need ideas for the holiday season? When I am fresh out of ideas, I tend to start with the people and places we love. Whether near or far, inspiration can be found everywhere and lead to anywhere.  

    We were counting all of the letters of the alphabet. I hear, “Mom, I love you, all the letters of the alphabet.”

    Love is everywhere. In little moments and in the meaningful conversations whether we know in the moment they are meaningful or not. Even “small talk” could lead to “big talk”. In fact, it is all big in the grand scheme of this one precious and wild life.

    The timeless adage still rings true. Don’t spend money. Spend time. Time with those you love. What is at the core of each and every single one of us is this: Time, Talent and Treasure.

    Ask those you love what they would love to do with the time you all have? Dare yourself to be pulled into the moment.

    They and it will all surprise you. When we ask…, we get at that heart of what the other person cares about.

    Some ideas, actions and answers that sprang up and out of boredom and inspired by an ask of:

    Q: “What do you want to do?”

    A: “I want to go to the car wash!”

    A: “Let’s count the stars.”

    A: “Write a book.”

    A: “Watch tv”

    A: “Can we add soap to the trampoline and jump?! Soap party!”

    A: “Make a cat house?!”

    A: “Play a game” (ie board game or action packed game of tag!)

    A: “Play chase us with the remote control cars!”

    A: “Ride our go karts.”

    A: “I want to make a fart fort!”

    A: “I want a piggy back ride!”

    A: “I want to fight!”

    A: “I want to climb.”

    A: “I want to roll!”

    A: “I want to swing!”

    A: “Knock, knock…(I want to laugh!)”

    …the answers are endless. Let it be. Let them play. Let yourself play. Shhhh, listen, let them tell you. Open your eyes, let them show you. Open your arms. Hug it out. xoxoxo

    Photo by Krivec Ales on Pexels.com

    books, childhood, children, earlyed, Ece, education, fall, family, Holidays

    99 Books of Pages on the Walls: Top Ten Children’s Fall Books to Fall into

    Gallery | Posted on by Jill Telford

    Photo by rikka ameboshi on Pexels.com

    Hello Fall. How I’ve missed you. I love the Fall (the book by Albert Camus) But especially, the season. Goodbye Summer. The leaves are falling down. Red, Yellow, Orange and Brown,…the leaves are falling down. Goodbye Summer. Hello Fall. The crisp is not only in the crunch of the leaves but also in the air. Chilly-Crisp the kind of weather love to read a book in.

    Here are my top 10 books for children for this season followed by a reading challenge. Comment yours below if you’d like.

    1. I Like Pumpkins by Jerry Smath
    2. Where the Wild Things Are by Mercer Meyer
    3. Abiyoyo by Pete Seeger (all seasons really!)
    4. Happy Halloween Biscuit by Alyssa Satin Capucilli
    5. Leaf Man by Lois Ehlert
    6. Goodbye Summer, Hello Autumn by Kenard Pak
    7. The Scarecrow by Beth Ferry
    8. Too Many Pumpkins by Linda White
    9. The Leaf Thief by Alice Hemming
    10. The Giant Carrot by Jan Peck

    Fall Book Challenge to Fall into. Get your Read on….

    1. A book with Fall colors red, yellow, orange and brown (on the front cover and inside).
    2. A book about a ghost, scarecrow, giant, witch or monster.
    3. A book about fall foods.
    4. A book about leaves.
    5. A book featuring fall songs (bonus: sing together!)
    6. A book about pumpkins and gourds
    7. A book showing the change of seasons
    8. A chapter book featuring any or all of the challenges 😉

    ****Heads up: Many of the books on the challenge are listed in the top ten. 🙂 Happy Reading! Love, light and change your way.