Tis the Season: the Jolly and Not So Jolly of Times

The most wonderful time of the year. But is it? I am feeling tension and unlike myself lately. I am missing loved ones who have passed. 105 people die every minute. Nearly 2 every second. Life is precious. So very precious.

When it comes to my feelings, I chalked some of it up to the full moon and it’s power of making waves. In fact, there has been a cataclysm of events making waves. Globally countries are struggling with leadership and death.

Lately, I have been hanging on to hope and resiliency. I stare at a photo of 6 year old Ruby Bridges who endured and triumphed standing as a metaphor and reminder that “what doesn’t kill you does in fact make you stronger”.  At 6, Ruby Bridges showed a courage that resonates today. I had the opportunity of listening to Ruby Bridges speak in 2015 at the annual NAEYC conference. The kind of courage and poise she personifies and how it connects with us, children, families and educators.

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Holidays are hard for many. For a lot of my own life, holidays were often off for me and awkward. There are empty chairs of those we miss and love. You feel the infinite loss and ache of missing loved ones. It is easier to send a gift and/or photo of smiling faces saying Happy Holidays. It is the thought that counts but what do we do for those who feel alone? How do we help others cope during grief or a sense of loss? What gifts can you give to the broken-hearted?

Here are gifts to give:

  • Gift of Memory: Take a moment to remember and honor the memory of a loved one by a hug, card or phone call. Although there is an empty chair at the table fill it with memories and honor their memory.
  • Gift of hope: We experience both sadness and joy. It’s deeply triggered by the holidays. Show up and offer to help those you care about. From the daily routines to collaging and scrap booking memories.
  • Gift of Love: Be in the moment with those who are still living. Show them you love them. If you are the one feeling sad tell them it is hard but stay hopeful.
  • Gift of friendship: Invite and include those who feel sad even if they may cancel or decline from shopping to having dinner.
  • Gift of Surprise and Spontaneity: Encourage doing something unusual such as a road trip or a flight to visit loved ones still here. Follow through.
  • Give the gift of time: Its about time well spent with those you love so spend it wisely. Spend some time whether over coffee, a movie, a stop by visit or something special to do together
  • Give the gift of food for the soul whether baked goods or a home cooked meal to enjoy together
  • The gift of listening: remember, it’s not not knowing what to say but listening and being there.

Looking for more gift ideas? Visit Sympathy Solutions at:

http://www.sympathysolutions.com/current-newsletter/10-things-you-can-do-for-someone-lost-loved-lone.html

Most of all, ensure to reach out, don’t expect someone who feels alone to reach out to you.

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What’s the Magic Word?

You know how usually when we want children to say please and thank you, we may say something like, “What’s the magic word?”

Well, this open ended question was recently responded with “Abracadabra”. We have been reading stories about magic so this response definitely makes sense. It made me smile.

While thinking deeply, I was super proud of our child in that moment. You know the stories entitled: Abiyoyo, Cinderella and Winnie the Witch? We have been exploring magic. Well in Winnie the Witch, Winnie the Witch says the magical words “Abracadabra!” to turn her cat many different colors and it disappears. And, her spell works. Every. Single. Time. So why wouldn’t my student (when asked the magic word) respond with abracadabra?! haha

The connections, synapses in the brain, schema and all of that building (and literal sense meaning making) shown in that one phrase!

Preschoolers make so many connections way more than in a lifetime. Let’s listen, really listen for it. Here are the facts: The little grey cells making up your mind are mostly neurons. There are 100 billion right now in your head! With over a 1,000 TRILLION connections aka synapse, in your brain, there are more transmission pathways in your head than there are atoms in the universe! Think about this: The number of synapses peaks in early childhood, so the average three year old has ten times as many as the average adult.

Later in the week, as I observed some children “Boiling eggs” while playing family,  I saw a child’s face go perplexed for a moment and he said, “My blood is boiling!” He smiled and said, “You know that means? I’m really angry!” He played with the words as he said it. Then he said, “But it’s not my blood but my eggs are boiling!” Next time I’m angry I’m going to say: my eggs are boiling!!” haha Some tips for observing and engaging with children as they build (and we build and make meaning of our world) reciprocally together.

How to engage with children…

1. Listen

2. Be present

3. Be playful

4. Be yourself…your best self

5. Throw whatever you thought you knew out the window…children have a way of proving theories and what we thought we knew wrong. When we think we know, we have no idea! Remember that.

Hence, why theorists are theorists. They are theories. Theories for a reason, a season and a moment until someone else comes along and proves it wrong.

We evolve and we change. Just like the seasons.

Most of all, just like our children, we learn so much about ourselves. When we listen ; they show and share what they need.

During this process, we also learn what we need for ourselves. That’s where the real magic happens. The biggest gift we give is of ourselves.

P.s. Thank you Lao Tzu and Picasso.

The Story Continues…in Real Life.

I have been working every Sunday but it does not feel like work.
It feels like play.
I feel really good to feel good about that. I would literally do what I do on Sundays for free, really. Last Sunday, I spent my time working with one child and playing. My high of the day was making up stories using the instruments to make sound effects for the stories we made up. I also retold my classics: aka my favorites: Luki and the Rocket Power Shoes and Luki and the Rocket Power Paintbrush. It was his first time listening to it. He asked for them again and again. I thought to myself…why am I in this rush to produce creative works of art when I should enjoy what I already have out there in the universe?
I am literally backed up on creative projects but I reflected on and about my own process. Am I enjoying the process? Am I enjoying myself? Why am I pushing and grinding to produce more and more? I have the stories. I enjoyed the process of creating them. Now let me create an outlet to massively share them using my voice and technology. I remember when a student asked me if I would be on her story podcast that evening she listened to it. Then, I recalled another student asking for one last story before she moved on and went to her new school.
I want to enjoy the stories that I have out. Recently, someone (whom I never met in real life) pushed me and inspired me to push myself even further in my creative process. The message on IG really has me thinking and mulling over a few things. 1. I need to make a youtube channel and 2. I really need to get a podcast together asap and 3. I need to be in the moment and enjoy the process and the re-telling of my stories rather than working on the next new project right away.
By the time of the next blog post, I hope to have one of my visions in the process of becoming. Intuitively, I feel as though I am on the way.
Peace, love and light.
Happy reading and before you know it, I hope to be saying Happy Listening. Real Life. 🙂

Rock, Paper, Scissors. Sticks and Stones.

Rocks literally rock. Rocks like boxes can become anything you want. In our preschool classroom we have been really into rocks. Actually even outside of our classroom, children have been collecting and using rocks in symbolic ways. Here are all of the ways we have been using rocks.
1. Collecting them which results in sorting, measuring, how much space we need, sizes of rocks and boxes needed to store them
2. Making up stories as we use rocks in symbolic ways representing the characters and props (i.e. building a bridge and re-enacting/retelling the stoy of the three billy goats gruff. We used small, medium and large stones to symbolize the sizes of the goats and one unique stone to represent the troll.
3. Make houses and caves out of them
4. Make shelves
5. Make flooring
6. Paint them and leave them in your neighborhood for others to find
7. Skip them over water
8. Build with them
9. Little grave stones for dead creatures from birds to bees and so many more!
10. A Rock Band (great polay on words)
11. Rolling Stones literally rolling them or rocking with them
Happy “rock”ing out.

We All Die or Do We?

To Die or Not to Die?

That is the question.

“We all die and go to Heaven.”

“We become angels when we die.”

“No we don’t.”
“Yes we do.”
“No we don’t.”
“Yes, we do.”
“All of us die. We turn into angels. And, we go to Heaven!”
A metal pail is thrown.
“We DON’T DIE.” 
“Yes, we do!”
“My Mom said we do. We all die and go to Heaven.”
We are born and we die. 
Or do we?
Our preschool classroom has me question everything about our life and spiritual existence.
Life is death and death is life.
C’est le vie. C’est la mort.

Do we ever really die?

That is the real question.

Big Brother

The moment we walked in the door questioning eyes were on us: “Who are you?” my coaches asked my brother in law and father figure as he questioned them as to why I wasn’t getting any playtime on the basketball team. My brother is black and I am white based on societal descriptions. He always stood up for me and had my back. From elementary through high school. We would get side way kinds of stares by people who weren’t exposed to different kinds of families.

My mother died when I was turning 10. My (I think biological father) was incarcerated off and on. I was raised by my sister and my brother in law. We were rare and uniquely different. Looking back and reflecting on my upbringing, I realize just how thankful I am. I was exposed to what children normally are not exposed to and as a result I am an eclectic kind of person. I watched and listened to shows, movies and music such as The Sopranos, Poetic Justice and The Streets is Watching. However, I always had someone present and there telling me someone made it or it was directed by someone. Someone made it up from their brain and it was inspired by real life events. I always had someone like my sister or brother in law telling me to cover my eyes during the racy parts.

I have so many memories from playing ball, driving around pretending to be on MTV Cribs to witnessing drug raids to people dying. This was my reality. So, I understand many walks of life. I was and am blessed to be surrounded by real, authentic type love. A rare kind of love that you cannot find. They never had to buy love or material possessions. Getting Chinese takeout, laughing, yelling and crying a lot, playing monopoly and playing ball was enough. It was my foundation of what a family is all about. Not perfect but perfect if you know what I mean.

As a grownup, I am working towards planting seeds where children will make a better life and ultimately a better world by reaching mutual understanding across cultures and perspectives. A world where people will know who each other is the moment they walk in the door. Questioning eyes will fade. The who are you will turn into I know who you are. A place where different families exist and it’s cool and unquestioned. People will stop and stare for how beautifully dynamic and powerful differences are. A place where it’s cool and dope to be different aesthetically, creatively and intellectually.

Moving Canvas

I love a good story.
During my breaks from teaching I travel around the country and I make up stories from my brain. I do this free of charge because I love a good story. When I arrive at the schools ranging from PreK-3rd grade without any books, children stare in disbelief because they are thinking “story time” will be with “books”. I mean right, shouldn’t it be? Duh. But no, I look at them and say, “You won’t believe this, I came all the way here and I forgot my booksBut I started thinking about where books come from?”
Then we talk about our theories of where books come from and answers range widely from an amazon box left on their front porch to a library. We narrow our theories and thinking all the way down to a computer and even further to paper. I ask, “Where do books come from before the paper?” Everyone stares. I point to my brain aka my nugget and mention “our brain”. I tell them I have a backup plan and I’m actually going to make up stories from my brain.
I make up several freestyle ones and some memorized. After, children are invited to make up their very own and/or illustrate my stories (or their own).
I am driven with this crazy idea that I want children to think and to create. I want our children to be inspired and see themselves as authors and illustrators. I also want them to see themselves represented in the story lines.  I want them to draw their characters too. Most often it represents who they are and what they care about.
When children care about the story, the rest handles itself.
*Author’s note: I purposely moved the words to the opposite side.* 

 

Jill Telford is an artist, advocate, storyteller, educator and creator of children’s books. @jill.telford http://www.fromtheplayground.com

Calling on Harold and His Purple Crayon

“Every line means something.”— Basquiat

Every child. Every human being is different. Each of us mean something just like every line does that Basquait was referring to. To draw a line in the sand due to these differences is indeed unfortunate. We are all a genius.  Genius in Latin literally means to give birth to. If we are all born a genius then how do we remain one as we grow over a human life span?

It’s really simple. It is all about tapping into who we are meant to be at our core. Being exposed to an open ended process way of being and becoming is as much vital for productivity as it is for the soul. How do we do this? How do we focus on the process and not the resulting product? Especially when we are saturated in a product driven world.

The following is what I’ve asked the universe for. And, I’m not going to ask for it again or repeat myself because I believe my deepest desire will manifest. I am already receiving and visualizing it into existence. Here is my vision:

*We take lessons right out of the playbook from a real life practicing developmentally appropriate preschool class room (school) and push it up as a model for our learners from birth through death. Early Childhood Education is from 0 to 8 — and birth through death when you deeply think about it. Learning in itself is for a lifetime. “Life-long learning” isn’t called that for nothing. Just google Jill Bolte Taylor, a neuroscientist and see how she rebuilt her brain with the help of her mother who was a former preschool teacher. You can also check out her TED talk here:

https://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_s_powerful_stroke_of_insight?language=en

This leads me to ask: How are our children learning? How are adults learning? How is our elderly learning? What is our quality of life looking like?

For those who know me — they know I do NOT play Bingo so if they see me in a care home 60–70 years from now and I am there playing Bingo as a recreational activity (unless I grew to love Bingo somehow over the next 60 years)— I know on a soul level they would know that I’d much rather be jamming out to an old school R&B 90’s album or Motown (shout-out to the Temptations)preferably while also being outside in nature. With technology — that can happen. Golly, at least open a window!

When I visited a dear friend in a nursing home who had early onset dementia, he was unresponsive and disconnected. I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to use the lower level of my brain and fight for his rights or flee and cry. But I did the only thing I knew how to do. I put early childhood education into practice as I met him right where he was to help him. I played some Motown and gospel songs from my phone. I knew he used to listen to that and rightfully should still be jamming out to it. He smiled. He bobbed. A tear rolled down his face. I got chills.

The next visit, I brought baby dolls, stress balls, scented play-dough. He rocked the baby. He squeezed the play-dough. He squeezed the stress-ball. He didn’t want to let any of these items go. He held the baby as though it were real and he started  rocking and humming a song. It reaffirmed that we are so connected to real life experiences. It’s the little things. — He is a father. His children are my age now but his connection to being a father and how he cared for them revealed themselves in the most intimate ways through intentional play. So yes boys and men hold baby dolls!

I also see this manifest itself in the college class I teach in the evening as well. Humans are craving something real and three dimensional. Students care about activities ranging from meaningful field trips, bringing in a meaningful object to write and talk about, having class outside to asking how are we feeling and even breathing together. Slowing down to learn, really learn and care. They want something that they can apply to their real lives. I find that as a teacher and learner when you care — the rest handles itself.

I deeply ask and reflect on how we are being developmentally and appropriately challenged? What is our approach to education? How are we approaching life? How are we taking care of ourselves and each other? Are we doing things just to do it and check it off our list or are we tasting the process? Are we experiencing life and being present?

Are we focused on the product? Or are we enjoying it as Harold did with his purple crayon (I’m guessing purple is his favorite color?) What is your children’s favorite colors? Who are they? What is yours? Working with children and families I face myself and ask myself who I am and who I am becoming. I draw on experience and reflect deeply about our practice and approach. Speaking of “drawing” — a pun very much intended.

Children often draw lines. For example, something like a star and we wonder why it doesn’t look like how we’ve been drawing stars for the past 100 plus years — but that’s where the magic lies. See when you really look at and study a Star and think like an astronomer or the five year old in your classroom — you really gaze and observe the many kinds of stars.

We can never recreate a drawing a child draws. It is intuitive. It is real. It is courageous. I look at the sky and see so many stars dim ones, bright ones and “connected dots” constellations. Children help me to connect the dots of our lives. For that, I am thankful.

We must arrive, see, smell, hear, taste, draw, talk, act, walk, create, shine, dim, fall, feel and die — like a star. Color outside the lines — like Harold. Draw your own lines — I wouldn’t suggest on the walls or floors though — unless BIG paper is covering it.

“Every line means [truly and infinitely] something.” — Basquait. That meaningful line like Harold’s crayon connects every single one of us. Keep connecting those dots to make this world better than how we found it and even better when we leave it behind.

Happy drawing and creating — here’s to you and our world.

The Collective Power of Our Stories

You are powerful.

You are creative. 

Most of all, together our collective voice screams our power and our courageWhere  does this kind of powerful energy come from? And, where   does it live and manifest  itselfget to see it manifest in the stories of our students from children to grown ups.  

Who we are and who we are in a process of becoming is just as important as Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.           

By telling our stories we create powerful connectionsHow do you show and share your story? How is your voice heard? Where does your voice resonate the loudest? The softest?

Seriously think and reflect on this. Iit through poetry? Spoken word? Is it in art? Is it  found in a conversation? We recognize through our stories and our lives just how    connected we are and that we are all in a process of becoming. None of us really know  & when we think we do, change occurs and to grow we must grow and go with the change. 

This is how we grow and evolve. This is how we become. 

Tupac Shakur said, “I am coming out 100% real  and I’m not compromising anything.” 

We are found in a single sentence. We are found in a line drawn and extended magnified or minimized like an MC Escher sketch. “Every line means something,” said Basquait.  If every line means something in a drawing, then that also means every curve, every freckle each and every part of us means something too. Every “line” in this life means something.  

Each action or inaction affects all of us even when we don’t think it does, it  does. 

What’s your story? Who are you? Why are you here? How do you want to make your vision a reality and your voice resonate and connect? What are you doing right now to make your vision come to fruition? Where are you? When will you share your story — your voice?

We’re all waiting for you to become you and even when you become you, you will still change and grow. You will get growing pains and experience hurts. What will you do  with it all? You will change. You will evolve.  We are all in a never-ending process of becoming.  

Over and over again. Leveling up or leveling down and around like a run on sentence or drawn out lines. 

We never come to a complete end and when we think we have reached  the end we are reminded again that we are only just beginning.

 

Meditate on This. Breathe, Stretch, Shake.

Mr. Rogers asked, “What do we do with the mad that we feel?” 

Here are some more questions to add onto his first question. What do we do with the excitement we feel? Or the shyness? Or the anxiety? Or an overwhelming sensation? 

What do we do? From children to grown ups? Five years ago, I woke up in the middle of the night inside of a tent. I had shooting pains going up my arm. I was overweight. I had shortness of breath. Each and everyday.

I was already experiencing shortness of breath and day and night sweats. I was prescribed an inhaler due to not catching my breath at times especially on the playground. This evening was a red flag. I experienced a minor heart attack. 

I needed to change my life. What do you do with this? You change your life. I started exercising. My hurts, my hangups,  my exasperation, my sadness and my anxiety dissipated itself into my sweat. I started breathing better. I no longer needed an inhaler. I could breathe big and deep. 

Naturally I dropped into yoga like exercises. I changed my habits and this ultimately changed my life. 

Namaste.