The Power of Love and Healing (Deep Work=Deep Breaths)

“One can only travel the long way into the heart of another: the slow work of finding common ground, the careful discernment of grounds of admiration, the disciplines of kindness, encouragement, silence, and restraint. It takes a deliberate choice, renewed regularly, to love every human being one encounters.” (Zena Hitz)

If it’s worth it, it will not be easy… something like that Bob Marley said. A monk was also quoted previously in response to this question:

“What’s the hardest part about being a monk?” He said, “Other monks”.

What’s the hardest part about life and love?

Other people.

Isn’t that funny? Other people. We do not have control. We have control only over oneself. Only of ourselves and how we respond or how we do not respond to others.

They say the highest form of flattery is gossip. If you find yourself trembling off the lips of another it’s truly none of your business. Monks do not talk much as it’s well known. There is a reason for that. Self-discipline and restraint. Choose not to judge and just respect the journey we are all walking.

Loving, guiding, whispering, petals of a flower as delicate as the work of our hands whether they are rough or smooth. Show your hands and it will show me your work.

Follow the palmar flexion creases on your hands. Your hands are your life’s and love’s work.

What you choose to do with your hands is your life’s work.

If you wreak havoc and chaos. If you choose to hit and harm, it is never, ever forgotten and permanently stored somehow, someway into the deep recesses of one’s mind. Memories are stored deep and remembered. Never forgotten. We all are patients of our own memories. Choose to love and be gentle even if someone sees it as a weakness. Because, in fact, it is strength. Gentleness is strength. If someone hurt you, you forgive them but move on. You do not have to forget. Lessons are in it. You learn what not to accept. You learn what not to do. You learn the lessons life dishes out and deals. You remember, forgive and you move on. Let it move you to dance. To sing. To read. To draw. To write. To paint. To act. To create. Scream love.

The [Heart, Mind, Brain and…] Body Keeps the Score always. A must read book is The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk M.D., found here: https://www.besselvanderkolk.com/resources/the-body-keeps-the-score

…remember while it’s a long way into someone else heart, it’s also a long way into your own heart. It is a deliberate choice to love yourself just the way you are.

What Had Happened Was…

It’s not about what’s wrong with you, it’s about what is hurting you. It’s all about what happened to you. I am in the middle of reading an amazing book entitled: What Happened to You? by Oprah and Dr. Perry You can find it here –> https://www.amazon.com/What-Happened-You-Understanding-Resilience/

The book that is changing and affirming lives especially mine 🙂

It is an affirmation that I am exactly where I need to be. Healing wounds not reopening them or simply covering them up with metaphorical bandaids and smiles. I am full of gratitude for giving the gift to myself and most of all giving myself the gift of healing.

As I am reading and reflecting about what had happened in my life as I read both Oprah and Dr. Perry also discuss a lot of what I learned and was gifted as a preschool teacher: the neuroscience behind trauma, it also reminds me a lot of Dr. Becky Bailey’s work with the brain stem, Conscious Discipline how at times we go into fight or flight mode. The Cortex is where we should be when making significant decisions. I love the brain and fell in love with it when I read Jill Bolte Taylor’s work: My Stroke of Insight.

What I am alluding to is the importance of the brain, how early childhood and early sensory experiences play into that and how they are the key to making imprints on us. A simple but not so simple scent can bring us back to remembering experiencing and even stepping through trauma. A mere scent can bring us back to the beautiful and ugly parts of our experiences. Embrace the beautiful, let go of the pain and h e a l. That’s how to help yourself. The early years are the most significant years aka the 0 to 8 years old milestones where a lot of our synapses are connected and made. As you continue to grow breathe, stretch and shake into your human way of being. And special shout out to our chakras! Intuition and Chakras are on fleek as we speak 🙂

Take a moment to think, reflect, draw: What happened to you? What hurt you and how are you healing?

Thank you at https://standwithtrans.org/product/intuitive-energy-healing-session/

Show and Share: A Soul Story

Show me your friends and I’ll show you your soul. Who are you surrounded by? How are you feeling? Are you inspired? Are you drained? Are you anxious? Are people talking about ideas or about other people? That is the question. And, when people answer…when people show you who they are, believe them. No judgment. Accept it but don’t you ever settle.

Our life’s work is what and where we go each and every day. Most of all, it is who we spend the most time with. I am grateful to be an educator and life long learner. It is a major part of who I am. We are in a constant process of becoming. Constant change. Each morning is a new morning and a new day. I yawn. I wake up. I stretch. I meditate. I breathe. I remember who I was, who I am and who I am in a process of becoming. I get to see who children were, are and are in a process of becoming. I get to see who families were, are and in a process of becoming.

I learned a lesson, a major valuable lesson this year during the Coronavirus. If you don’t like something, say it even if your voice trembles. Speak up even as old trauma reopens because you’ve been triggered by someone’s behavior. Always stand up for those who are not present in the room even when you’re afraid to. Follow your gut. Your instinct. It will never ever steer you wrong. Ever. We are always in a process of becoming never reaching the final product. Movement is life.

I am thankful. I am grateful for all that I have experienced. I learned a lot and will continue to. I forgive but I don’t forget. I use it to propel even further holding hands of others on the same route.

Healing from Trauma:

  1. Time: Give yourself time and hugs
  2. Journal: Write a lot
  3. Journal: Create an art journal *Bonus: Paint some canvases/cardboard and give it away!
  4. Write a letter *your choice to send it or not*
  5. Reach out to those who care about you
  6. No need to respond to toxicity: Let it go, let it go, let it goooo!
  7. Cut out negative+toxic relationships
  8. Stop making excuses for people and hold them accountable. If they don’t change. You leave. Let it Burn as Usher would say lol